Interview conducted by Ayanna Muhammad, Editor-n-chief
Walidah Muhammad is a Wife, Homemaker, and Mother to three beautiful girls. Some of her passions are cooking, fitness, fashion and all things beauty. She’s not a regular Mom, she’s an epic Mom!
AM: Wife, Mother, Homemaker, and holding down all these titles with style and grace. How do you manage to make it all look so effortless?
WM: Those of us that have been blessed to be Mother, Wife, Homemaker knows that they all are many things but “effortless” is not on the list (smile). How I manage? I seek help! At times when help is not available, organization and preparation keep things flowing almost effortlessly.
AM: Thinking back to when your motherhood journey began, was it something that you planned and was prepared for? And what was one of your biggest challenges with adjusting to being a new mom?
WM: When my motherhood journey began I was nineteen years old and one year into my marriage. Obviously, us being married so young we weren’t prepared but we did plan our first child. By me having two younger brothers, I had a little experience but nothing could have prepared me for my own. My biggest challenge was facing the fact that I’ll never get a full night’s sleep again. Hey, a girl needs her beauty rest!
AM: Following your social media, it’s evident that health and fitness is always apart of your agenda. What are some tips you would given mothers who may struggle with trying to balance maintaining good physical health, whether it is workout or diet, in their day to day activity?
WM: Eat sensibly, even when your children are gorging on their favorite pizza and snacks. Sometimes us moms will finish our children leftover food in the name of not being wasteful. DON’T DO IT. Also, play around with various workouts to discover what suits you and your lifestyle best. Utilize fitness apps and free YouTube/Instagram videos. Keep track of your weight and progress. Personally, I fast for a number of days when my weight increases just to jumpstart things. All in all, have fun with your physical activities. It can be very enjoyable.
AM: It’s no secret that starting a family naturally comes with some individual sacrifices. Are there any goals you had for yourself that were put on the back burner once you became a parent? If so, what were they and do you have a plan to still go after them?
WM: College was put on the back burner once I became a parent. When my first child was old enough where I felt comfortable going back I ended up moving to France and then to Italy which further prolonged my return. With life, traveling, and more babies I continued to put it off. I am proud to say, that in 2020 God willing I plan to start school after nineteen years.
AM: Often times being a stay at home mother comes with the stigma that it’s a much easier task versus being a working mother, simply because your focus is “solely” the home. Do you agree or disagree and why?
WM: I disagree. When you properly run a home it’s a company and your vision, strategy, leadership, and management(of health, finances, food,etc.) requires you to think and act like a CEO. The average stay at home mom works the equivalent of 2.5 jobs. One survey said, the average mom gets one hour and seven minutes to herself every day. Whether you’re a working mom or stay at home mom, motherhood is not an easy task but it is the most noble profession a woman can have.
AM: Thinking about your own upbringing, what are a few values that were instilled in you and your siblings that you find yourself passing on to your children? And why do you find them important today?
WM: Being raised in a Muslim household I find myself passing on most, if not all of the values our parents instilled in us. Of course, I am not as rigid and my parenting approach may be different but those core values remain the same. A few are: Speak the truth regardless of whom or what. Sharing was/is non negotiable. We were forced to share. Allah(God) being at the center of our family. That includes going to the Mosque, praying, reading the Quran and learning about God to develop our own relationship with him. I find them important because the core values is the foundation that we stand on today.
AM: Raising children in this new generation and in this climate is very different then the time period in which most of us were brought up. As a mother, what do you believe are some fundamental tools in which you will find to very key in the overall protection, physically and mentally, of our children so they are well equipped as black boy and girls in America.
WM: Giving them knowledge, sharing wisdom, teaching integrity, instilling principles which helps in the building of character are what I believe to be excellent fundamental tools for any climate and every generation.
AM: With hindsight being 20/20, what is some advise you would give young Walidah to better prepare yourself for womanhood and motherhood?
WM: Nothing in life is perfect. No perfect People, place or things. There is no perfect mother, wife, relationship, or child. Once we settle on that we can actually enjoy motherhood, womanhood, and family. If you’re looking for perfection you will never be happy, so settle on the best parts of yourself and those around you while striving to be better daily.
AM: Motherhood has many peaks and valleys. Everything doesn’t always go as planned and things can get overwhelming, which is why support can be very critical. What does support look like to you? And do you feel you had a good support system?
WM: Motherhood has a way of strengthening even the weakest of us. So we may feel we have it all under control at times. But what we all need is someone we can vent and be totally candid with about the highs and the lows. I have been very fortunate to have a Mother from the very beginning I can talk to and have the support of. So yes, I have a great support system.
AM: Essentially , our children and their children are our natural legacies that will continue to grow long after we are gone, so we strive to be examples for them to mirror. If there is one thing you would want your children to say about you and the kind of woman you are, what would that be.
WM: I would want them to say that I loved and cared for them deeply. That I thank Allah(God) for them and that it is an honor and privilege being their Mother. I want them to take my love wherever they go in life and never forget me.
Thank you for allowing us a peak into your journey through motherhood thus far!!!