I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T…..Do You Really Know What That Means?

Written by Amira Hakeem

Where are the single moms at? You are here, because you’re always there….for your family, for your friends and most importantly for your children. But what about yourself? Sometimes single moms aren’t selfish enough, but instead overly selfless. One could ask, are all single moms doomed to just be hard working and independent? Independence is great, but its ok to want a little more than that. You are in the ladies room today, so pull your hair back and turn on Octonauts for the children because you need to hear this. Now listen and listen good.

First off, you are hot stuff! Go look in the mirror. See, hot stuff right!!! Make sure you take a moment everyday between meetings and play dates to hype yourself up. Despite all the chaos, your life revolving around another human being, and the drama that may be, remember that you are still you. It sounds basic and simple, but it’s oh so complicated and takes major practice, but you got this girl!

Secondly, relationships are possible. Some may say a lot more difficult when you are single mom, but definitely possible. The thought of bringing someone into your chaotic equation for them to just potential shake it up and then chuck the deuces can be a little scary, BUT we that doesn’t haven’t to always be the case. Stability is important when raising  children, and the same thing applies when it comes to your relationships and blending families. Healthy relationships are exactly what children need to see, so be the example, because nine times out of ten they are watching. Your time is valuable so just make sure that if you decide to dedicate a substantial amount of energy to building meaningful relationships, make sure it’s worth it.

Last, but certainly not least, self love has to be real. It requires a lot of work, but get use to the term. You probably put everyone else before yourself, and find the most joy out of seeing the people around you happy, but keep that same energy when it comes to yourself sis. It’s a beautiful trait to have, but sometimes it’s at the expense of of your own happiness or sanity. Look deep within yourself and deciding who you are, what you stand for, and what makes you happy. Write a list of the things you want and stick to them. Don’t bend or break your own rules for anyone. Set aside personal time for yourself.  So find that thing that brings you to a peaceful state, and keep at it. Whether it’s reading, prayer, meditation or just your favorite playlist to vibe out to, do you. The better you take care of yourself, the better you are to the people around you. 

You work hard, so if no one told you today, you are appreciated for everything that you do. You may slip, and sometimes you might even fall, but get up, adjust your crown, and continue to be the Queen that you are, because you got this.

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